For those of us who are smart, innovative and impassioned with ideas regarding how things should get done, especially in today’s virtual world, it is easy to find ourselves heads down on projects that matter most to us.
Getting things done is important. But, sometimes, when people disagree with each other on priorities or processes, the disagreement causes us to have emotional reactions. When this happens, I sometimes hear the term “triggered” being thrown around. When we feel triggered, it likely means that we are experiencing an emotional response to a situation that doesn’t need that response.
Here’s an idea:
The next time you feel triggered, cross the street on yourself and ask yourself if you are really triggered or did you possibly just over-react.
Crossing the street means that, instead of arguing your point of view against somebody else’s point of view, you drop your beliefs and cross the street to their side. Once across the street, you ask the other person to explain to you what they are seeing and experiencing from their side of the street.
When you cross the street, you immediately diffuse any potential charge from the situation, because you are empathizing with the other person by asking them to explain and share. Asking questions like “help me understand what you are seeing” or “help me understand your point of view on this issue and how you believe we can solve it” lets the other person know you’re ready to listen and learn. These questions and the act of listening is designed to help build bridges and connect people with the goal of collaboration which leads to creativity and growth.
Crossing the street leads to effective problem solving.
Crossing the street can shift your point of view. And shifting your point of view can help you collaborate and compromise with others.
We must cross the street so we can connect more, create more and grow more.